MessyMayhem Mission Statement

Purveyor of videos and photos of messy girls, wet and messy fun and slimy silliness featuring gallons of gunge.

Monday 30 May 2011

Just who is the Chief Piespector???

Episode 16 sees the return of the nation's favourite Messy Jessie, but this time she isn't happy.

Unhappy by the lack of pies in her last episode, she takes a complaint to the only one available, work experience Scouse One, who then refers the matter to Team Leader, Cornish....

Still not happy, Jessie becomes quite agitated and quite angry, so the Chief Piespector is brought down and she is not happy.

The Chief Piespector, aka Messy Lauren, then proceeds to cuff the messy miscreant, and dish out justice.

This episode is a meeting of messy minds and its what a lot of people have been waiting for!


Soon on www.messymayhem.com!

Sunday 15 May 2011

..........derr na neerrr neerre neeeeeeoooooooo....

For those who don't speak guitar riff.....thats the opening chords of the Derek and the Dominoes classic "Layla".

Layla was our life saver. After several aborted shoots over the weekend, both Scouse and Cornish were both flagging. After a day relaxing, and with a happy Candie ready to go, it was up to our quintessential English Rose, direct from the Potteries of Stoke-on-Trent who came up to play, her exact words were "I've been dying to be asked to do one of these"

So a few things you should know about Layla....

1. She's starred in a small budget film which is currently doing all the film festivals - the film is called "The Stone" and it's getting some rave reviews....

2. She's a tarot card reader and reads the lines on your hands. Yup she can tell what you've been upto with your palms lads.... ooo err, be afraid!

3. She is very very funny and quick witted, and really she should do stand up...

So in Episode 15 Part 2 both Layla and Candie play the game that all the girls want to play to win.... "Sticky or Twist". With prizes of sweets and wine and the obligatory Cornish bottle of cyder on offer, it was always going to be competitive....with 12 bits of paper, 4 prizes, 7 sticky or twist and 1 gunge, the game is fairly simple - win a prize continue and risk being gunged and lose the prizes too!

So.....



Layla.................

... we got you on your knees
...Layla......
 ....she's begging Darling please!


Enough with the Clapton already, the gungetastic update is up soon at www.messymayhem.com - simply press the download store button on the side!

Sunday 8 May 2011

New Look. New Episode....

Howdy dudey folks....


Like the new look, well we thought it was time for a spring clean, and a change is as good as a rest...


Right.... Episode 15.... is here. It stars Yorkshire lass Candie who had starred previously on Messyangel and from the Potteries, Layla!


Now Candie jumped at the chance to join with us, even so when crisis befell our shoot went tits up. We rescheduled it for the following day, and she was totally fine.


All we needed was a replacement. Now when choosing models, the Scouse One has a list of approachables... this truly was one of the funniest profiles we have ever read.


"Hello, I'm Layla and I'm a model.

I've got a great rack and a cracking arse, which is a good job because I'm as thick as two short planks, with the personality of a pair of socks.

If I can say 'model' instead of summat right boring when people ask me what I do, I'll be able to shag loads of footballers and even marry one like that Posh Spice did, which would be pure dead brilliant.

All my photographs are heavily photoshopped and at least five years old. I have had nine kids since then, and my Excma has sadly returned. I'm a good fifteen pounds heavier than I'm letting on, but it doesn't matter because I probably won't bother to turn up anyway. Especially if I'm up the duff again.

I give a mathematically impossible twelve million percent on each and every shoot, and of course I am bubbly to the point that you will probably want to strangle me and dump me in a wheelie-bin.

I speak fluent text. If you're lucky I might even send you one half an hour before our scheduled shoot to lie about why I can't be arsed to turn up.

Obviously you're all falling over yourselves to book me now. My boyfriend/manager tells me it's been made illegal for topless models to handle their own business affairs, so all bookings must go through him. He will accompany me to all shoots to glower menacingly at you, especially if you look at my boobs.

It says I don't do adult, but if you tip enough Lambrini down my neck or tell me you're a bit famous I'll do bestiality, necrophilia and fisting. Only if you promise not to publish it though."





So we dropped her a mail, and she replied.... "I've been waiting to do one of these shoots for years"!




With models ready to go, and a crisis averted, both mine and Scouse's batteires were recharged and we were ready to go.




Episode 15 Part 1 - Don't Laugh....


So for our first part of this new Episode sees Candie take on the impossible challenge of Don't Laugh Or You Will Lose, a game which has yet to claim a victor! Would she be poker faced or will she guffaw at the first opportunity......








With the humour of Layla, she didn't stand a chance now did she.....


Coming very soon to the download store.....